This is my last Christmas while I am still in high school and honestly, I thought it would be much more exciting. Recently, I have started thinking about how Christmas used to be. As a kid, Christmas time used to be one of the best times of the year, but now that butterfly feeling in my stomach just does not happen anymore. 

When I was younger, I always got excited for Christmas break because of Christmas of course. Presents and tons of good food made for a very happy day that always excited me, but now I am more excited for the time off rather than just the day itself. This year has been quite stressful, to say the least, but that is not to say that it has been a year I did not like. This year went by really fast and it does not feel like Christmas other than the fact that it is getting cold outside. 

Since I have had a job, I have felt the responsibility of having to get everyone Christmas gifts. I now realize how stressful gift buying is, but finally, I am pretty much done. Along with this being my last Christmas while in high school, it means that college is just around the corner. So, when my dad asked what I would want for Christmas I instantly felt guilty in a way because I know that we will be spending more than enough money for this new chapter of my life. But, even with this, I have noticed that as I get older, my Christmas wish list has become much shorter and way more difficult to write. I remember when I used to write Christmas lists and they would be around twenty items long, most of which being things and toys I saw on commercials while watching my cartoons. 

So, now that Christmas is right around the corner, I still am not sure of what I would like as a gift. Being able to spend this Christmas around the people I love sounds like the perfect Christmas to me because I do not know when I will be able to see my friends again while I am in college due to our plans leading us our separate ways. But, for now, I will try to enjoy this last Christmas while I am in high school.